nesting, April 28, 2023

My past nine months have been tumultuous. How has your life been?

These months have been filled with uncertainty, disruption, and unrest. How strange that this isn’t the first time nine months have encompassed so much. How else does that duration manifest itself in my life that have not been so obvious? Of course, it’s my own marking that delineates between parts of my life. What is the mark that separates the nine months from the year, the two years before that, the four before that?

What the latest nine have taught me is how important home is. I thought I was more adaptable, flexible. Maybe I am to a point and that point was long ago passed. It turns out I like to have a space of my own. Of course, there is more to it all, but for simplicity’s sake, when this reaches you, I will be reacquainting myself with my books. I will be carving new pathways.

Change is inevitable. I was reminded in an email announcing the end of yet another publication. I am tired of looking at how the things I value in this world are so often under-supported. One person cannot do it all for everyone forever, but it seems like so much of our world is built to set up that dynamic. To have one person or small group burn themselves for the sake of others. And still, those others wait, for the next individual to take up the torch.

Let’s try again. I have always been one to sink into despair. Life is not exactly like that, and I know we have to be careful of the stories we tell.

I am cultivating a beeswax candle habit. It’s a ritual of sorts, without the gravitas but not without the need for nourishment. I’m focused on doing things that benefit me and those around me. So I’m embarking on an experiment of sorts in May. It may go nowhere, it may leave me the light tracings of new friendships. I’m interested in how you know a person is someone who will speak to you as deeply as how you want to engage with the world. I’ve worked hard to read the signs better and to more quickly recognize and move away from those who are only capable of an uneven exchange.

The next six months, when you will hear from me next, will be filled with more things. Announcements, good ones, and work to be done. I feel something changing in me with regard to my writing, and I’m excited to meet it.

All my best,
or things I’ve read, viewed, listened to and that are zinging through my brain

All About Love by bell hooks
Interview: Kevin Kelly, editor, author, and futurist (shared with me by BW)
Mundane’s World by Judy Grahn (shared with me by aLP)
things I’ve published recently, but, you know, it’ll be nice to revisit old things too

Michael Anthony Garcia on Southwest Contemporary
Interview with Chaitali Sen

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